Teaching your mother (or daughter) to ride: a guide for families

Teaching someone you love to ride a bicycle is one of the most rewarding things you can do for them. It can also go wrong if everyone is nervous. This guide builds on Cycling UK’s advice for teaching adults and children, and on what we have learned from our own sessions.

Before you begin

• Choose a calm time and a quiet, smooth, flat place, ideally with few onlookers. A closed ground or empty car park works well.
• Check the bicycle: brakes work, tyres are firm and the saddle is low enough for both feet to be flat on the ground.
• Ask about worries, physical or emotional, before you start.
• Check clothing: nothing that can catch in the chain or wheels, such as a loose dupatta or long hem. Sturdy, closed shoes. A well-fitting helmet.
• Keep sessions short, about 20 to 30 minutes. End before anyone is frustrated.

Be the right kind of teacher

• Be patient and encouraging. Nobody learns well while feeling watched or judged.
• Praise effort, not only results. “You looked ahead that time!” is better than “Why are you wobbling?”.
• Let the learner decide when to stop.
• Resist the urge to hold the saddle for long. It teaches the learner to rely on you instead of finding balance.
• Stay close, with a hand near but not on, in case of a wobble.
• Remember how scary it was for you, if you can.

Follow our five steps

1. Step 1: meet the bicycle. Walk beside it, squeeze the brakes, get on and off.
2. Step 2: scoot and glide with both feet on the ground, then lifting them. Many adults learn this in one to three sessions.
3. Step 3: add pedals. Start with the stronger foot raised to about the two o’clock position, then push off.
4. Step 4: practise turning, riding straight and looking behind.
5. Step 5: learn hand signals and road rules before riding near traffic.

You will find each step in detail in our “Learn to cycle in 5 steps” series.

Common worries, and what to say

• “I am too old.” Cycling UK’s guide says nearly every adult can learn, whatever their age, with patience, persistence and the right technique. Tell the story of a woman who learned at 40, 50 or older.
• “People will stare.” Choose a quiet place and time, and bring a friend. A women-only group is even better.
• “I will fall.” Falls while learning are usually slow and small. Lower the saddle, wear a helmet and practise stopping first.
• “I am not good at this.” Everyone wobbles. Praise each tiny success.

Keep going together

A short weekly ride together builds the habit, and the memory lasts a lifetime. Plan a destination, such as a park, a relative’s house or an ice-cream shop. Take photos. Celebrate every first.

Supporting independence

Writers on women and cycling in Bangladesh point out that social stigma and limits on movement are among the biggest barriers women face. A family’s support can be the difference between a bicycle gathering dust and a daughter or mother who rides to school, work or the market with confidence.